I recently had the opportunity to connect with the amazing students and faculty of the APEX center at Virginia Tech. The facility, which happens to be above one of my favorite restaurants in downtown Blacksburg, is incredible! It invites innovation and engagement. But more impressive than the facilities are the students.
I got to sit with a small group of those students and enjoy lunch before presenting to 80 students enrolled in an entrepreneurship class. Over the duration of my visit, I heard myself giving unexpected advice that I didn’t anticipate giving. It is always fun for me to learn more about myself and my journey as I respond to questions from people with a fresh perspective.
Write in a Journal Regularly
That advice may sound so strange – initially – when hearing that I was speaking to a group of super smart business students with entrepreneurial ambitions. However, so many of their questions were about how I discern who I really am, my personal brand, what to do next, or what the future holds. I found myself citing, more than once, how critical it was that I use a journal to not only explore my own thoughts but also to look back over time and see themes, trends, and also insight I couldn’t see while I was writing. I saw some students smile knowingly, because they are already in this regular practice. I saw others realize that they now had one more tool in their entrepreneurial tool kit – it was very cool.
Advocate, Don’t Sell
I’m nearly certain his name was Ebenezzer. He approached me after my presentation, the kind of student who comes with impressive insight and poise. One of his questions was related to how he has a strong product, strong company idea, but feels unsure how to sell. He said that being able to sell seems to be something that other entrepreneur students are surely struggling with. Our conversation happened with New Hope Girls bags between us and they were the perfect illustration for my ultimate advice: consider it advocacy rather than selling.
Most entrepreneurs bring a sense of passion and enthusiasm to their concept, product, and/or business. With passion and deep-rooted belief comes the ability to advocate rather than sell. It releases some of the pressure off when you realize you are simply sharing an amazing opportunity rather than trying to force someone to make a commerce-based buying decision. So often our struggles and challenges don’t require a dramatic solution but rather a simple re-frame.
Have a Parallel Passion Project
I’m telling you – these students were so insightful! One question was how I managed to accomplish my book writing, masters degree, work full time, and have a family. First, I appreciated his awareness of how much I was swirling. I was honest – it was overwhelming at times. However, when I really thought about the answer to his question I realized my book was such a beautiful passion project, that spanned a few years, and over that time I worked on it as I could and as I felt inspired. I didn’t work on it full time for 4 full years. Rather, I would make progress then put it down for a bit.
Writing my book existed in parallel to the many other things I had on my plate. I would have amazing moments where chapters would flood out of my brain and flow directly onto the page. Then, there would be weeks – or even months- where the writing was at a stand still. Keeping it parallel and letting it be a joyful expression was part of what allowed me to persevere through the big dream of becoming a published author.
Network without Needing Anything
One insightful student brought up the idea of organic networking versus forced networking. Interesting. I have never thought about anything but organic and fun networking. As she spoke, and shared more, I completely understood what she was referring to. She mentioned how she can always feel out the forced connections and also can sense when it is genuine. Later, the idea resurfaced when I was asked specific questions about my first business and its subsequent sale. I mentioned that it all began with a coffee meeting with nothing needed or wanted on my end. It was just two people visiting, connecting, and getting to know each other.
Knowing people, just to know them, is a beautiful thing. The most important things in life happen within relationships. Pursing people will lead to a network and community in which unexpected, wonderful, and important things happen. Don’t wait until you need something specific to connect with people – make it part of your regular rhythms and routines.
Surround Yourself with “Mirror Holders”
I coined a new “Caitlyn-Term” at this speaking engagement: mirror holders. I talked numerous times about the need to find people who will hold up a mirror for you. By that I mean people who will help you see yourself accurately. Not only do you need people who will speak the hard truth but in this difficult and often discouraging world, you need people who will help you see the best in yourself. In general, most people don’t struggle from over-confidence but rather deep insecurities, fears, and doubts. As entrepreneurs we choose to push through, live brave, and manage risk. However, my ability to do all those things has been dependent upon a great core group of people who will be honest with me. It takes time to develop these meaningful relationships and my advice to these students was to not delay the development. Today is the day to invest in people and to build your circle of support!
My sincere hope is that this advice, which I surprised myself with, can help you in whatever place you are in right now. This advice is great for entrepreneurs but it extends into every-day-living too. These principles can help us all succeed in life in rich, meaningful, and impactful ways. The reality is, this world needs people who are living at their full potential. When we are all our best, most empowered selves, we leave our maximum positive impact in our wake.
